I'm Afraid

Yes I'm petrified. Not so much of the vehicle itself, even though there is no way I would EVER own one. What if I have more then three kids? I'll drive a suburban, anything BUT a minivan. Anyway, why am I so afraid of these relatively economic vehicles? Because of the people who drive them. Every time I am cut off, have someone riding my backside, or see someone driving without any regard for other beings on the road it is inevitably a minivan.

Example 1
I am making my way to a three way stop, already indicating that I am going to be turning right. Minivan woman decides that she wants to try and cut me off by coming around my right. Beside the fact that this is completely illegal, when she finally realizes that I (the person in front of her) is turning right she has to slam on her breaks and still almost rear ends me. You can smell the burning rubber can't you?
The worst is not over. When it is my turn to continue I make the turn and proceed down the highway towards my home. The speed limit on this stretch of highway is 40mph which no one seems to abide and as you have probably already suspected here comes minivan woman hot on my heels riding my backside once again as I am abiding by the SPEED LIMIT!
I indicate that I will be turning left and begin to slow down. Minivan woman decides that she is going to try and overtake me on the LEFT!!! Which is the direction I indicated I am going! A vehicle was oncoming so she was not able to perform her once again illegal maneuver. She then had to slam on her breaks once again. But to her relief she realizes that the shoulder is wide enough for her to continue her minivan tirade down the highway. And that makes three illegal maneuvers within a mile stretch.

Example 2
Once again I am behind a minivan and we are waiting for the left turn green signal. Minivan women is busy talking/yelling at her children when the lights go green for the traffic going straight. Minivan woman goes right on through, narrowly missing a barrage of oncoming trucks, diesels and goodness knows what else. And what made matters worse is she was completely oblivious. She honks and flips off the drivers of oncoming traffic. Clearly the numerous oncoming vehicles are the ones who are in the wrong. Isn't it wonderful to know those children saw their mother swearing and acting like a complete baboon and knowing that they now think it is the correct way to function in society. I cringe!

Example 3
This example is dedicated to all the minivan driving males out there. Why do you always look so angry and frustrated while you drive your precious minivans? Driving aggressively and recklessly will not make you appear more manly in your minivan. The rest of us do not need to suffer through your apparent need of an ego. Get the sports car if you must. Whatever makes you more of a man.

*Fine print
We at "It's called an opinion for a reason" realize that not all minivan drivers are crazed and scary. And hopefully these examples are more of the exception rather than the rule.